untitled

never sure of the cause
who is the cause
what is the cause
is it her?
is it you?
is it anyone else?
the levels of stress hang in the air
you can feel it when you walk in
not sure who it is
i really need to get away from
i hope it's not you
i hope it's not her
it's too hard living without you both
perhaps
you could both live without me?
you say you couldn't,
but being pushed away isn't so different
from leaving of my own volition
clearly
there are more important things on your minds
you haven't even noticed
i'm already gone.

untitled

back to this
we've always had this
i can't remember anything before this
i hope there is nothing after this
only this
despite never being completely satisfied with all this
i will stay with this
this is all i ever told myself i'd need

this is all i have left.

untitled

welcome back to this pit
we've missed you
i can almost honestly say i missed this too
it's comfortable here
i know what to expect
the past year has been
a whirlwind
a blur
a slow spiral to the ground
perhaps even further
who knows how much longer i will fall?

there seems to be
no end to me.